This isn’t about willpower.
Wew! These GLP1s are not a joke. My problem has never been working out or eating healthy. It’s been quieting the cravings. I don’t expect a magic pill to give me muscles, but I’ve been saying for years there’s a mental aspect to this that’s on par with traits of someone who suffers from addiction.
Society doesn’t take food addiction seriously enough. Personally, I don’t think it tears families apart like substance abuse or alcohol abuse, but it’s a real thing and the internal struggle is exhausting.
To be honest, many people who dish out advice have never struggled the way many of us do. They have great intentions but it just doesn’t land.
Saying I’ve been tracking calories since I was 15 is INSANE to say out loud, but it’s true. There have been MAJOR wins, but that tiny voice in my head, that only gets louder, has never gone away. Even when I was running 10 miles a day, lifting, and eating everything I was supposed to, that voice was loud and it NEVER shut down. Motivation only lasts so long. Discipline is important, but when the world around you is diving headfirst into the closest buffet or cheesecake, it’s harder than it should be. And 27 years of struggling to maintain or lose weight is too much. It’s dumb.
I’ve had a lot of time to think over the past couple of months. At first I looked at the GLP1s as cheating. “Naw, all I have to do is keep a deficit. You’ve done it before and you can do it again.” Then the voice of reason that’s been tucked away for a bit spoke up and reminded me that this has been a struggle since I was a child. Honestly, with the body I have, I shouldn’t have to work this hard to keep it moderately overweight! HAHA
So I’ve had a TON of time to read lately, and I started hearing these thoughts referred to as “food noise.” 100% nailed it. Food and overindulging are built into humanity, and I believe that everyone experiences a level of “food noise,” but for some of us it’s way louder than for others. Many of us have also been brought up on Great Depression principles of “eat until your plate is clean.” How many have heard someone say, “There are kids starving in the world, so clean your plate?” I think I heard that from every adult as a child. It was well meaning and never malicious, but if I only eat half my pint of ice cream will that really help a starving child in a third world country?
I guess my point in sharing all of that with you is I know I’m not the only one who has gone way too long with little or no support when it comes to maintaining a healthy weight. I know I’m not the only one who looked at GLP1s like cheating, or is afraid of their long term effects, short term side effects, etc.
A thought on long term side effects. There comes a point when you do some risk management and say, what’s hurting me more? Being 20, 30, 40, or in my case 50 pounds overweight heading into middle age, stressing about food constantly, or GLP1s? I’m in NO place to recommend this to anyone, but I can say my current trajectory puts me way more at risk. Let this be a conversation between you and your doctor. Maybe this is an option that can help you.
So that’s my thought process that got me to today. I’m 4 days in. Since I don’t like needles, I went for the new daily pill from Wegovy. I take it first thing when I wake up with a very small amount of water, and have to wait at least 30 minutes before I eat or drink anything else. So far, that’s been the hardest part since the coffee IV starts right when I wake up.
I was told I probably wouldn’t notice any major difference the first week since this is a starter dose, but many people have reported feeling subtle differences. I’m pretty sensitive to medications. I’m not sure if that’s the reason or maybe it’s just a placebo effect, but on day 2 was when I started noticing that “food noise” went from a 10 to about a 4. Let’s say my scale is 0 to 10.
I snacked a bit, but the biggest thing I noticed is I had NO craving for anything sweet. And if you know me, you know that’s kind of a big deal. I can kill a pint of Ben and Jerry’s to the disappointment of my dog. This is especially true if I’m sitting at home, and due to an injury at work, I’ve been home A LOT. So that’s the first thing I noticed. No desire for anything sweet. I actually felt a bit lost. I read instead and then went to bed.
I’ve been tracking calories using the Lose It app, and day 2 was the first I came in under my weight loss goal at around 1,600 calories for the day. Well within the weight loss range. The biggest thing to me was that I didn’t have to work hard to avoid the ice cream. I just didn’t want it. WHAAAT!
I also noticed my lunch was small that day, and my dinner was pretty healthy and very filling. So back to lunch. If I’m sitting around the house my default is usually 2 turkey and cheese sandwiches with a massive pile of tortilla chips. On day 2, one turkey and cheese sandwich with a moderate amount of tortilla chips, maybe 2 servings per the side of the bag, was enough. In my mind I’m saying, “WTF, that’s it?” And it wasn’t like I was full. I literally only made one sandwich, ate it, and was fine. Again, the “food noise” turned way down. Placebo? I don’t know. I can usually eat my way through that.
Day 3 came around. This was Monday. Monday was interesting because I was only operating on 3 hours of sleep. I don’t believe this was from the GLP1 because I had some anxiety about the day. I had a doctor’s appointment first thing to look at my injury, and as much as I don’t want to go back to work, there was a side of me that misses the people I work with and was ready to go back. If I’m being honest, there’s also a side of me that is more than okay with staying home! Anyway, that kept me up a bit.
Normally when I don’t get enough sleep I try to “eat away the tired.” Like, whatever filter I have to keep me from going 50 pounds overweight to 100 pounds overweight is totally gone on little sleep. Not Monday. Tossed and turned all night. Woke up at 7a, took the pill, waited, drank some coffee and had zero appetite. I never felt sick, just felt like food wasn’t necessary. To be on the safe side, I still had a banana before I left for the doctor’s office at 9 and came home around 10. Still not hungry. I ended up eating the same thing I had on day 2, maybe a bit less. Again, I wasn’t trying to eat less. There was no struggle. I just didn’t want any more. The “food noise” was gone.
I don’t mean to sound dramatic, but at one point it felt lonely.
Like, I’ve had this noise in my head for so long and it was mostly gone. That’s the best way I can explain it. I was watching some Ted Lasso and my hands felt empty not dipping into a bag of tortilla chips. WTF is this?!!?!? As the day went on, surely I’d be ready to eat my spouse’s gelato in the freezer, right? Not even in the slightest. I ended up working on my websites and some other small things to keep me busy.
Day 3 ended with 3 small meals. I had a small snack of hummus and pita chips, but that was it. Didn’t overindulge and ended up tracking around 1,800 calories, which is more than day 2 but less than usual, normally over 2,500. I think I was up higher because of the hummus, but my goal is to keep it between 1,700 to 1,900, especially while I’m not really active.
So this is day 4, Tuesday. I woke up at 9 after getting some much needed sleep. Took my fourth dose, waited 30 minutes. Started the coffee ritual. Not hungry at all this morning, but I did eat a banana just to be safe. I don’t want to starve myself. It’s now just after 12 noon. Most of the morning I’ve been hanging out with the dogs, working on some cool t shirt designs, keeping up on my work training, and writing this. Am I hungry? Eh, I mean I could eat something small, but I don’t feel like I’m “starving.”
I get it, it’s only 4 days in. People have their opinions on this, but for anyone who asks me I’m going to recommend talking to a doctor about this, especially if you’re like me where you’ve been struggling with this for so long. I don’t know the long term plan here. I’m focused on the day to day to get started. All of these years, and it wasn’t until I came to terms with the “food noise” that I realized there’s more to this than being deemed “lazy” or a “glutton.”
Oh, side note about weight. I am down a few pounds BUT I’m not going to lie to myself and claim it’s fat. That usually takes a few weeks. But as much as I’ve had to go number 1, I imagine it’s water weight and a reduction in inflammation.
Anyway, that’s my story so far. I would love to hear from you! Feel free to put a comment below!
Please do not take this as medical advice. Talk to your doctor. This is 100% based on my personal experience. This post is not sponsored by any company.
